these are things i’m not going to argue about, im not going to fold into my theories, or are just concepts that have been mistakenly passed around as fact. READERS BEWARE!!!!: i am a hater. if i trash something you believe its its only because you are an evil person who is bad. just kidding…..looks away mysteriously.

this section is much more informal than the history parts, which are heavily cited. sources: trust me bro

“it was all a dream. the nightmare, the waking world, none of it is real.”

this theory sucks so bad and you know it. not only is there nothing to back this up, its used as a cheap cop out to explain away perceived plot inconsistencies or any information that doesn’t make immediate sense. its trite, its boring, and super mario bros. 2 already did it best.

“the chalice dungeons are dreams/nightmares/overlap with one or the other and that’s why you fight repeat bosses in there”

i’m pretty sure this is a multilayered misunderstanding. its a case of bloodborne being a video game with realistic limitations and some lore misreads. the isz chalice says it overlaps with the cosmos. the implications of what crossing with the cosmos means is not clear other than what we see on screen and experience with our own god given eyes and hands; as far as i can tell it just makes things blue and moldy. combine this with the ambiguous notion of “slumbering Great Ones”.

ill say it again in the actual essays but heres how i view “slumber”: the reason the game calls the absence of  the great ones “slumber” is because of the whole dream theming of the game. but the reason why they “slumber” is individual to each instance. kos died from unknown causes, the great ones of isz just fucked off somewhere and left ebrietas home alone while they went to paris (but presumably died), the great ones of loran are dead or pushed out. so on and so forth. but they aren’t REALLY dead. they’ll re-awaken, some day. that’s what it means to slumber.

they’re fake dead. like you, the hunter. they’ll be back.

“_____ is based on/a reference to h.p. lovecraft/other real world fiction!”

probably not unless you’re talking about berserk, jojo, d&d, and magic the gathering. or paris, france. fromsoft wears its references on its sleeves. its not subtle. look at these cards from innistrahd lol bruhhh no way lol

you should also take a look at a “brotherhood of the wolf” (2001) and “bram stoker’s dracula” (1992). sometimes they just steal ideas entirely. i forgive them forever.

if anything it’s a wonderful positive that bloodborne steers away from the lovecraftian standards of cosmic horror. look, we all went through our horror dork phase where we got really into weird (as in the genre) fiction and thought cthulu was the coolest shit ever and then eventually found out about lovecraft’s cat’s name and discovered how metaphors work and who he was REALLY writing about. the man did indeed lay the foundation for far more interesting people to build off of. but the man himself doesn’t just suck because he’s a level 99 racist, he’s also unbelievably boring and rote. “omg could this be nyarlathotep?!” no!!!! lovecraft describes his monsters in either the vaguest terms possible or racistly!!! no exceptions!!! his descriptions apply to nearly any monster!!! and even if it was, so what!!! what would that even mean in the world of bloodborne?? why would that matter! what would that tell us about the setting, characters, or motivations!!!! all you did was use your pattern seeking monkey brain to compare two things superficially!!! AAAUGH!!!

bloodborne was obviously influenced by cosmic horror conventions that sprung up from lovecraft’s writing. but there is nothing in the game that is meaningfully comparative on a 1 to 1 basis.

“oedon is _____!”

his name is formless oedon and he exists only in voice, lacking a form. if you ever say this dumb shit to me again i will flip you around like a switch blade.

“bloodborne takes place in the demon souls/dark souls universe!”

i’m going to slap you. i don’t care about the umbasa! forget about the umbasa! let it go!

“rom is a byrgenwerth student!”

ok this one is fair because i didn’t even know this until i started writing this whole thing. but there’s absolutely nothing that suggests that rom was a human, let alone a student. hm!

“the blood you get from the women is menstrual blood!”

hey pervert, you pull it from adeline’s arm in the dlc. unless you have a serious misunderstanding of the MOST basic female anatomy the answer is “no its not what is wrong with you”. do you think arianna just pops a squat and what. pisses it out? into a vial specifically made for intravenous blood collection irl?? do you think all the girls in yharnam have their periods synced? someone should kick you. you know what, i’ll do it

“________ happened because (total conjecture)”

sometimes scary things happen because it would be scary if they happened and there was no rational explanation. its kind of important to keep this concept in mind lol

“viola’s body disappears after you kill mergo’s wet nurse!”

no it doesn’t.

“ebrietas is the source of the healing church’s blood!”

timeline doesn’t add up on this one. the old blood existed long before the choir found the isz chalice. im going to read this sentence to a normal person and demand they tell me what they think it means.

“the healing church poisoned old yharnam in order to trick people into using the old blood!”

why. like i understand why you would sicken a population for financial gain, but what was step 2 of the plan. why would they poison them with something the old blood couldn’t treat if the point was to show off the healing power of the old blood. this stupid theory makes no sense lol. its based entirely on someone coming to the conclusion that the water of old yharnam was poisoned purposefully based on literally nothing. why not just give out free samples like dealers do. some suburban dorks came up with this theory, they don’t know how a good scam works

“with 0 insight, micolash won’t be able to jump through the mirror!”

sadly, not true.

“the laurence in the hunter’s nightmare is a projection/his soul!”

why is laurence the only character who gets single out for the catholic hell treatment that shows up nowhere else in the canon. why would the mechanisms for him being pulled into the nightmare be different than everyone else. like i know he’s important in the canon but who did that to him lol. kos? how?



anyway, let’s get on with it

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